depressing..

A feeling of helplessness has come over me as of late.You hear about these big companies and world wide food chains shutting there doors left and right .banks not wanting to give loans..etc. it makes me wonder if its ever gonna end or keep on this destructive path that's bringing our nation back decades on the economic scale...And there i am finaly absolutely in love with my situation, my restaurant, and my job .. And yes I LOVE MY JOB!! at what i could consider a pivotal point in my career . my mind ever so expanding and challenging (at times to my own detriment) yearning for a new ingredient or technique that could change the way people think of food. to see the love and the art that goes into nourishing .Trying to provide a memory with each passing plate ..But MY concentration and studies have become harder and a bit fogged by my constant worrying ..will it change... Its not easy thinking about a wine dinner in January while wondering if we are netting enough revenue for my boss to pay the mortgage..or when we do 40 covers on a Saturday night how are we gonna meet pay roll..i love my boss like a second father and i can see desperation in him at times and that kills me..i try to all that i can , i work by myself in the mornings (which i have always found relaxing and therapeutic) i do the dishes I've lopped the crew to a fraction of what it once was. IT KILLS ME! i still feel like were failing!! And for the first time its not that the restaurant I'm in ain't working right (concept,food,location) its the economy.. a beast no one can defeat ...Boston restaurant are down 40% ..its every where its a damning epidemic....i just hope to god it fixes it self...until then I'll be working hard to support my wife and kids. in this time of disparity.